Building Strong Relationships, Require Good Communication Skills.

Building Strong Relationships, Requires Good Communication Skills.

As an apostle I am speaking out against something that I believe grieves the Holy Spirit as much as it does me. It is the lack of communication among the brethren, especially those in leadership. On the OIMF Wall Quote today, I wrote: Communication is the key that opens the lock to understanding. No wonder so many people are confused, mis-informed and ignorant to the truth. When leaders fail to communicate with one another, the rest of the body suffers, because it can’t function without being given direction. (Amos 3:3) Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

This isn’t something new, it has been going on for a long time. Open disregard and disrespect to communicate with one another unless it suits our purpose, yet how can we say that we love and support our sisters and brothers in Christ, when we fail to talk with them? It is frustrating for me as a leader to “run people down” because they won’t return or respond to a phone call or email within a reasonable amount of time. I consider reasonable to be a least within 48 -72 hours. Unless you are on vacation, left the country, sick or something has happened that hinders you {such as a power loss, dis-connection of service, technical difficulties etc.} why is it that people don’t take time to respond?

Several times I have tried personally communicating with people in the OIMF Group and on Face Book to network with you and just to extend encouragement, some I have never received a response, while others it make take awhile, but eventually I hear from them with an apology of why they procrastinated in returning and responding to my messages. Do you think that others are less important and don’t deserve a response from you? That is the impression we give people when we don’t communicate with them.

Many times people from other churches and ministries have called me for advice and counseling, and I asked them, “why haven’t you talked to your pastor?” more than once the reply has been, “I can’t get in touch with them,” or “they won’t return my phone call,” or “they’re too busy to see me.” How can we be effective in leadership when we don’t take time for those who are following us?

The Holy Spirit shall bring all things to your remembrance. John 14;26 When someone calls and leaves me a message, it is my policy to make sure I respond back within a reasonable time frame, I have even instructed my members and ministerial staff that if it is an emergency, please inform me of it and the nature of the emergency on my voice mail, and I will call you back immediately regardless of the hour. When people don’t hear from me, they understand that something has prevented me from responding to them and they will call again or call someone who has access to me. This is accountability on my part as a leader. I have been appointed as the Shepard over God’s sheep, a spiritual mentor and overseer of leaders, and the matriarch of my family, all who are important to God, therefore I have an obligation to make sure that I am available when I am needed, to listen when they need someone to talk to, or to give counsel when my advice is needed. You can only do this when you have open communication with people. One of the main reasons that so many relationships have crumbled, dissolved and marriage have ended in divorce is the lack of communication. It is a tool of Satan that he wields very effectively, to bring discord, confusion and contention which leads to doubt, fear and mis-trust.

We expect people to hear us when we are speaking, (Rom 10:14-15) “How then shall they call on him in whom they have not believed? and how shall they believe in him of whom they have not heard? and how shall they hear without a preacher? And how shall they preach, except they be sent? as it is written, How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things!” People look forward to hearing from us, hoping that we will have good news, words of encouragement, sound counsel and advice, and a prophetic word from the Lord. This doesn’t always happen from the pulpit, or in church, it happens when we have open communication one with another.

There are going to be times when people don’t want to hear from you, but at least they will respect the fact that you communicated with them. Many prophets have been spurned because of the message that delivered, yet the people knew them as true prophets of God. We have a responsibility to one another to make sure we get and respond to the messages we received, regardless of whether you deem it important or not.

I learned years ago when the bill collectors were calling me unceasingly, that not answering the phone wouldn’t make them go away, but confrontation would certainly defuse the problem, and acknowledgement of the debt with a solution would stop the harassment. Therefore I changed my strategies and made sure that I was well prepared to talk with them, and knew what I would say without telling a lie, so that my conscience would be clear and my phone would stop ringing.

If you don’t want to communicate with someone, simply inform them. At the bottom of most email communications, there is an un-subscribe clause, you can click on to avoid further communication from that company, even in spam mail. When you don’t want to talk to someone, let them know that you are not available or please do not contact you again, but avoiding them is not making them stop or go away, and it brings a reproach upon you for not responding.

When people don’t want to be involved with me or my ministry, I prefer they tell me, rather than just go along for the ride, you’re taking up space that someone else can fill. The Bible says, (Gal 6:10) As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

One thought on “Building Strong Relationships, Require Good Communication Skills.

  1. It is important to have good communication skills so that the other person knows what you are doing. This how we stay in sync with one another and are respectful to one another’s needs. It saves time and a lot of hurt feelings when we don’t respond to efforts to make contact or just to talk so that we get an understanding of how the other person is feeling. People cannot read our minds nor will they know what our desires are if we don’t express them. It also pays to be respectful to one another. Do unto others as you would want done to you. People judge by how we handle our affairs and always respond in a timely manner because it could be a blessing in disguise that you might miss out on simply because you did not respond in a timely manner.

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